Discouraged, Dismayed and Growing Desperate

We skipped church today. We probably should have gone, seeing as how we could use the uplift. It's always so heart-warming to see our old ward family. But for some reason I just couldn't stand to share Steven's last few hours before he went back to Galveston with anyone. I know we can't make a habit of this...but today...well, I just couldn't share.

He left a few hours ago, and I am bluer than blue. What in the heck are we doing? We can't keep this up, it's just ridiculous. We just can't keep relying on the charity of family and friends. Today we talked through several options.

1) We could just go ahead and lease an apartment in League City. The pros would be we'd have a place to live. The cons would be we'd have to spend Christmas in an apartment, because NO ONE will give us a short-term lease given the recent supply-and-demand circumstances. I thought maybe the insurance company might cover the penalty if we broke the lease, but considering their recent track record, I'd hate to take such a pricey chance.

2) We could try and find an extended-stay hotel to stay in while we house-shop. This would be the ideal situation, seeing that I'm almost positive insurance would cover any additional living expenses we might incur. But after looking on Orbitz this morning, we realized that NO ONE has vacancy. The closest we could get would be Conroe, so what's the point?

3) We could submit Steven's resume up here and pray that someone will immediately see his brilliance (which they would if they were smart) and hire him on the spot, starting Monday. But he's only been a computer programmer for 4 months, and nobody looks kindly on job-hopping anyway.

4) My dad called today and suggested that we just rent a house down there for just a year, and then submit Steve's resume around DFW. That way Steven would have a year's worth of experience under his belt, and he would be considerably more hireable...which was definitely something worth thinking about. Yes, I know, it's only been a few months. We need to give League City more time. But Ike's done enough to scare the hell out of me, and somewhat justify my initial instinct that maybe the Bay Area just isn't the right fit for us.

But how in the world can I resign myself to renting for ANOTHER YEAR? Another year of white walls, of being a transient, of no stability. Having the whole stigma of sharecropping, feudalism, throwing our money away on something that doesn't belong to us. Another year of burning with secret envy when I'm in the beautiful homes of my friends. I hate it. I just hate it.

And for the first time in our marriage, our pockets are just bursting with the money we've saved up. We could walk out the door today and buy a house. But we don't want to just buy the first house we see...especially because once we buy, we're staying put. The housing market isn't going to let us sell and walk out whenever we want.

What are we in the world are we going to do? This would be a perfect time to have a mentor, a guru, a respected authority-figure or friend to give us their wise-and-steady opinion...or at least give us encouragement. I wish I could talk to Mom.

Waiting Game

Steven drove back to Arlington on Thursday night. He’d exhausted himself running around League City, talking to the insurance agents, harassing FEMA, digging through the wreckage and putting salvageable things in storage. He drove all the way back to Arlington in his un-air-conditioned car (of all the things I wanted destroyed in Hurricane Ike, it was that idiot car. Of course, it survived with just some minor damage).

But he just found out around noon today that he’ll be expected back at work tomorrow! He’s homeless, with a wife and two small children, but they want him there bright and early, regardless of whether or not he slept in his car. I know for a fact that other people in his department, who incidentally still have habitable houses, have been allowed to work at home via remote access. So why is my husband, who just started this idiot job 3 months ago, an absolutely indispensable employee all the sudden? Oh well…they have a company to run, and I guess someone has to be there.

So I will stay here in Arlington with my brother and Steven will drive back to League City and stay with friends. There are just no hotels or apartments to be found down there. EVERYONE’S been displaced, and so all temporary living spaces have been filled. We don’t know what else to do. I guess it will be sort of romantic…. having a long-distance relationship for awhile. Thank goodness for our friends at church who’ve been willing to house a refugee or two.

We’re just waiting for the Emergency Rental Locator person (who will be helping us find a temporary apartment to stay in until we can find a house) to call us up.

All this waiting is turning my hair gray.

Salvage

Steven left for League City today. He went over to the house to survey the damage. The food in the kitchen has begun to rot, and so its swarming with flies. All three bedrooms are pretty much unsalvagable. My computer, however, including my PC, monitor, printer/scanner and program CDs are all completely alright!! Apparently our trusty computer wardrobe (thank you, Walmart!) kept out the rain and heat enough to keep it all safe. Who'd o' thunk that plywood-and-glue piece of junk could have withstood so well? Also, our teeter-totter and all the stuff in the shed (including Stevie's bike) are perfectly in tact and usable, so that's also good news.

Steven said it looked spooky and horrible, but somewhat fascinating too. He's going to buy a pushbroom tomorrow to help sort through the debris. I personally wouldn't think twice about bulldozing the place and everything in it. Its all tainted now. I'd rather try to forget the things we had rather than try and put back together the broken, ruined pieces. It would just be too hard.

Going Crazy

All of us are. We are all driving each other nuts. I never thought I could be so entirely irritated with everyone I love, but here I am. This close proximity with little or no privacy is the pits. Seriously, I hadn't realized how much Steven and I depended on those 37 1/2 hours of separation each week to keep things fresh between us. Because it's not fresh right now, people. It's downright funky.

I don't know about anyone else, but something happens to me when my husband is home. All the sudden I assume I too am on vacation, and all the caretaking that's usually a part of my daily routine stops in its tracks. The dishes pile up, the kids aren't dressed yet, beds never get made and dinner is take-out. But I'm making a pact with myself to try and go throughout my day productively, despite my sweet husband's presence.

And we are seriously getting on each other's nerves. We're snipeing at each other about, say, who left the toothpaste cap off, or who forgot to stain-wash the clothes before doing laundry, or whether Michael or Dwight is actually the most annoying person on "The Office."

I think we're ready for a breather.

Disclaimer: Anyone who knows me knows how much I totally adore my husband and realizes that this entire post is just me blowing off steam.

Happy and Sad

Things I'm happy about:
1. We're all safe.
2. New furniture to replace the crapfest that burned in the fire.
3. Having all this extra time with my hubby.
4. Getting to see and spend time with all my awesome Arlington friends for awhile.
5. All the wonderful, selfless, amazing love everyone has shown us in the form of friendship, sympathy, clothes, gifts and money.

Things I'm sad about:
1. We miss our crappy stuff.
2. Being nomadic, with no real private place of our own.
3. All the pictures we alway meant to scan and never did that are gone now.
4. Video-cassettes of Stevie as a baby and Steven and I during our band-playing days.
5. Feeling unsure about money, since we haven't even been assigned an insurance adjuster yet.
6. Feeling unsure about when our life will get back to normal again.

To see the carnage...

To see some pictures of the mess, go HERE.

Worst Fears Realized

On Saturday afternoon we got a call from our landlord who had stayed down in League City through the hurricane. He told us that he had been over to check on our house, and that it was destroyed. A large oak tree had fallen on the left side of the house, smashing our storage room/office, which in turn smashed into the power service entrance. It started a fire that burned an enormous whole in the roof and the middle of the house. They retrieved a picture or two off the wall, but that was it. Everything's gone.

The bad news is, of course, we're homeless. The good news is we're insured, and most of our things are replacable. We'll be able to compensate for everything that was destroyed in the fire with the money. It's just a question of how long it will take to get it, and what the heck to do with ourselves in the meantime.

We've had so many amazing friends housing us and giving us clothes or money. We feel so overwhelmed with gratitude. We are SO GRATEFUL that we were led to LEAVE THE HOUSE and therefore were absent when the fire started. I am safe, my precious babies are safe, and the love of my life is safe.

Consequently, we will be in Arlington for an indiscrimiate length of time. We actually have no idea what to do next. It's just wait, wait, wait until Steven finds out when he has to go back to work and we both find out if my Dad and Adam's houses made it through okay. I think I'll be staying after Steven goes back to League city to get things straightened out. I can't bear to see the house, and I don't want the boys to see it either.

SO ANYWAY--if you're in Arlington or close by, give me a call! Chances are I won't have plans.

Update on Ike

We made it safe to Arlington after an ELEVEN HOUR CAR RIDE from League City. The traffic, obviously, was horrendous. But the Kirchman's are kindly giving us shelter until we find out whether or not we're going to be homeless.

We arrived last night around 11:30am, chatted till about 12:00 (Sarah, you are just too interesting to talk to, darnit!) and finally fell into bed around 12:30. I've never slept so soundly on a futon bed in my entire life.

Today we just hung out and talked, went to IHOP and also went out with my dad and brother. Sarah even watched the kids for us so that Steven and I could finally go and see "The Dark Knight" (which was AWESOME, by the way).

Tomorrow I'll get to go and visit for awhile with my dear friend Jan and then later celebrate at another friend's baby shower.

How strange is it that I get to have this friendly, relaxing little vacation while my father's and brother's houses, which are both on Galveston Island right by the water, are being blown to smithereens? And maybe our house too? Who knows...we're new to this whole hurricane thing, and maybe I'm just overreacting. It's very unsettling and yet unreal at the same time.

I'm just glad we're all insured up to the eyeballs. But that won't get my wedding pictures back if our house is flooded (how could I possibly have forgotten them????!!!)

IKE

Uh-oh. This looks like the real deal. It's suppose to get nasty around Saturday morning, and might even be a Category 3. Depending on whether or not they evacuate us, you might be seeing us in Arlington this weekend. But it changes so much you never know where it will be in 2 hours, much less 2 days. So we wait and see. Eek! (but slightly excited, anticipatory eek)!

HURRICANE!

Okay, folks...Hurricane Eduoard is comin' at us! I've been keeping abreast of the situation here. They let everyone go home early at Steven's work, and he doesn't have to go in tomorrow. There hasn't been an evacuation order or anything, just a warning. We filled our tanks up with gas and went to the grocery store (just in case) and it was packed. I guess everyone had the same idea. We bought enough water for our 72-hour kit and plenty of food. We put the candles right next to the matches (where we can find them but out of the kiddos' reach). I wonder if we're forgetting anything...hmmm.

Well, anywho, this is all very exciting. Kind of like a holiday or something.